My Bestfriend is Married

on 25th December 2019, one of my high school sweetheart got married! I am beyond happy for her and fuh, I still can't believe she's now married everytime I look through the pictures all of us took. she's so beautiful and of course looked so happy, so I am happy. 

watching her walked down the isle with her husband, reminded me of the memories I had with her. the first time we talked to each other and how since the day, the day Farah Dayang and Ana approched me after mid term exam (well, I was crying), I followed you guys around even when I was being a bitch nak merajuk je reti :p Farah always the girl I clings around (the fact that we were in the same homeroom made me super attached to her), I merajuk most of the time with her, talked to her the most, slept with her everytime I get scared at night, and so many more! I am so grateful to have known you, and able to call you my bestfriend.

we left Ana behind. siapa suruh lambat :P

the morning of the wedding, Dayang Qeyla Nisa and I went to the mosque and waited for her. Ana of course, she was late and miss the whole thing :') Farah being Farah, she was the one driving to the mosque 😂 then when she was about the enter the prayer hall, she saw Mus and ran?! well that was epic 😌 we managed to get it on camera! hoho dah nak kahwin pun still sakai

how is this girl is now someone's wife?! where did all the times go?

the nikah session was rather short. we were busy taking pictures and suddenly, she is now a wife! we were so confused. we were like, 'is it done?' 'is this a practice?' Mus came reading the taklik and we were still confused. and suddenly they asked to exchange the ring. I didn't get the time to go all emotional as I thought I would be lol we took some pictures and went back to our homestay, waited for Fasha to arrived, and then went to the hall for her sanding.

dulu sekolah semua ni muka busuk je :P lol

mcm biasa, then there's us hehe.
that day was our 8 years together too!
hehe love you baby

the whole semashur peeps

it was a very tiring day. it was so humid but seeing her on the pelamin looking all fabulous and pretty made me so happy. we ate, talked among ourselves. my gossip girls never short of topics to talk about. i love that we all still able to talk as we were used to despite not being in contact all the time. I love hearing their updates about life. the night before, Dayang Ana and I were literally stayed up talking about life. work life, study, future and loved it so much! well i still do! it feels good to see my best buddies all grown up, living their life to the fullest, having their dreams come true 🙁❤

to Farah, 

you will always be my day 1. you are always there for me when I needed someone to talk to. you always layan my crazy perangai even i know, it annoys you all the time. when i was at my lowest state, you still there convincing me that i am going to be okay. thank you for putting up with my craziness and my mood swings. we may not talk to each other like we used to, we may not close like we used to. but know that, if you need me i am just one call away and you can always talk to me when you want to. i am so happy seeing you happy, all of your achievements, how you're living your life to the fullest. congratulations on your marriage baby, have a wonderful marriage life, make cute babies hehe :P ahhh i am soo emotional now lol i love you baby girl, always ❤

love,

Fyfaa

My Accountancy Journey

well, as you all may or may not know, I am a Bachelor of Accountancy (Hons.) student from UiTM Puncak Alam. 

back in the day, after finishing my SPM's Biology paper, I was pretty sure I like math soo much, well I still am, (I can never relate to people who thinks maths or add maths is hard, because they are not :'(), so in my UPU's form, my first choice was Diploma in Accountancy. then my SPM's result were out, I got A+ for modern maths and A for add maths, so I was soooo sure that I'm gonna take things that is number related based on how I was so in love in numbers. so my first choice was just right. then when the UPU result were out, I managed to get myself into the program that was top in my list. in my mind at that time, like many other people, accounting would be all about numbers. then my Diploma years started, I was shooked to the core on how accounting was nothing I ever imagined it will be, but I already half way through so I gotta keep going. years passed by, Diploma ended! I even graduated with AD :') I was so happy you have no idea (even tak ANC and tak first class, but a girl gotta take whatever she can lol) 

since I have started my college with accountancy, I gotta keep going right. then of course BAcc. well if you think accountancy is all about numbers, think again. I think during my entire accountancy journey, I have met with theories more than I met numbers. like hm, why do you call it accounting, like account, but nothing like the term account that everyone thinks you are? like why?

I have never been soo stressed out in studies like I have been this whole 5 and a half years of taking accountancy. it was so hard. I would cry everytime I have to sit for exams, tests and even some quizzes. the level of stress I have to endure was out of this world. especially degree. 

well, the focus for this entry would be on the last semester which I am currently in. at the start of this semester I just can't wait to get this over with. I'm so tired with being a student. my program (for me) was so hard. I can never take more that what I already have. I felt like it was too much. this semester, at my week 3 of classes, I already have 1 presentation to prepare. that was the start of never ending presentations, reports, write-ups and so many more. 

I took 6 subjects this semester. and guess what. each subjects have soooo many assessments. we even need to do role play for our Integrated Case Study course! never in million years i thought accounting students would have to be a theater students, drama students >.< we danced, we have to be good at editing videos. producing a 45 minutes drama. like we did so many things that are not accounting-related. haha. but all is well. but still.... you got me right? lol I never thought I'll survive part 8. but fuh here I am, in the final week of my lecture classes, one month away from the end of my degree life. aaaa I'm so sad now. I'm gonna miss everything about Puncak Alam. It was soo tough for me to get here.

It was a hella ride. this semester made the bossy part of me came out like no other. I became the person I always wanted to avoid. I remember saying that I wanted to see the good in people in everything. well, all that has long gone. I don't even know who this girl anymore. I became more emotional than before. all of my bad sides. I hurt people's feeling, but they hurt mine too, so I just give back what I got lol (that's unhealthy, but like I said, I don't even know who this Afifah is anymore) 

this week, when the lecturers said 'this is our last class' my heart broke a little. this semester's lecturers are just the best. so many life advises, tips and so many more. I love every lecturers I have ever encountered. but this semester is just so different. I'm just sad at the fact that I may never see them again in the future. when we took the pictures, then say goodbyes to them, the sad feeling is just different from what I felt before at the end of class. I'm just happy at where God has taken me, to this point of my life, to the people He let me meet, to the teachers and lecturers He let me learnt from :'(

you know, this semester (Part 8) was (still is) so tough for me to get through. I stumbled most of the times, I get mad every once in a while. but this particular semester has taught me soooo many things, have let me to learn different sides of people (even the dark sides of myself) and I am forever grateful for that :'( this is a sad post but life goes on eceh :p

my best-est lecturer in giving life advises! love you Dr Sha :'(

Internal Auditing (AUD 679)

my "Desires" team hehe (role play MAF671)

MPG FACT 2019

my cute Seminar of Management Accounting (MAF651) Madam Noreena

Integrated Case Study that made us all go crazy lol (MAF671) Dr Rina

I love you guys do :'( rindu nya nanti AC2208E

well, I have 3 more lecturers that are misisng out here, will include later! hehe

love, Fyfaa

My Best-est Week

so, Farah is getting married!!!

my friends and I were really over the moon when she told us the date of her wedding. we were all like very giddy when she mentioned that.

D-30

so, Qeyla created a Whatsapp group for the 5 of us to plan for Farah's bachelorette. it took like a month to plan on this. first thing first, the date. not much happened because we all kinda agreed on the same date. next, make sure Farah is free on those dates. so, she is free. then, the venue. the 5 of us were looking through the Airbnb to look for a place that will fit us 6 and affordable of course - Fasha and I are still students sobs. we found a place! it was nice and all, but then when Dayang tried to pay, cannot. Ana tried, cannot. I tried, cannot -,- so we need to ask Farah to settle that. it's her bachelorette, yet she need to handle that lol. we ended up find another place since the initial place tah kenapa takleh bayar. so that's that. then, pjs. done! food, done.

D-14

2 weeks before the party, Dayang suprised us with her amazing award! Graduan Terbaik! like what does she eat doh to have such brilliant brain?! we were all like so proud of her. I was on the verge of crying. ugh, if she told us during the party, I would bawl my eyes. her late father would be so proud of her. haih, she's so inspiring i can't even! :'(

so, here's where all the tricky parts started. just after Dayang told us the news, Farah created a Whatsapp group! another one. the four of us was like, what? she wanted to surprise Dayang during the 'sleepover' that we planned. I quickly messaged Fasha, and we both were like, now what? we wanted to surprise her and she wanted to surprise Dayang pulak? hello, can you please let us do our work? lol we cooperate, but with minimal effort put >.< the four of us, Fasha, Ana, Qeyla and I created another group for this. the struggle fuh. countless of times we almost slipped out words in the wrong group.

D-Day

Fasha and Qeyla arrived at the Airbnb at about 2 something, but they could not find the keys. Ana and I stranded at LRT as there were no Grab available? tah lah stress. we waited for an hour kot just to book a Grab. the distance from the LRT to that Airbnb was like 10 minutes away, but we traveled for like 30 minutes? fuh, what a journey. as we arrived there, we waited for the elevator for like 10 minutes more. I was so upset because, it was raining and there were a looot of people there. fun fact: I hate crowded place, I get anxious. as soon as Qeyla pick us up to take us to our place, Farah called. guess what. SHE'S ARRIVED! we were so shocked, I ignored her call and we lied to her saying that Qeyla went somewhere and she'll only be back in the evening. that crybaby called her fiance to fetch her up and she was furious :P she called Dayang, complaining. Dayang is sooo easy to handle. she just followed whatever we ask her to do.

the four of us decorated to place, fried some nuggets and fries, set up the table. little do you know, Fasha brought her mom's fancy plates and glasses. and guess what again. one of the glasses broke! :') it was hilarious. we were so clumsy but yeah whatever. i brought my mom's fancy bekas lauk. thank God nothing was broken haha. so we finished the decoration at like almost 7. we ask Farah her where about. SHE WAS AT SG BULOH! at this point, Dayang was still roaming around the condo with Faten. she was also in the verge of getting annoyed as we were very slow at picking her up. so we decided to surprise Dayang first. Qeyla and I went down to the lobby. we were wearing the PJ! hahaha so we pick Dayang and Faten and we surprised her! she was more surprised with us rather than the surprise itself. lol. it was all over the place, but one thing, settle!

this cake is just the best! 😭❤

the look of it, the taste of it 💯

now, the main girl of the evening. we thought she'd arrived around 8 or something. we were STARVING waiting for her. we haven't eat anything for the day. we were thinking to ask for Mus' help. we called him,

convincing Farah to come as fast as she can. well, failed

Qeyla and I: Hi Mus. Ni kawan Farah.
Mus: haa? sorry?
Qeyla: kawan Farah

Mus: sorry, I think you got the wrong number
Qeyla and I looking at each other with questions on our faces: eh no no no. ni kawan Farah
Mus: oh, kawan Farah. yes
Qeyla: Farah ada tak
Mus: haa? *he continued to hah for like a good minute*
Qeyla: takpa, suruh Farah tengok phone

the struggle to understand that 'non-Malay' man was a true struggle XD we called her and she said that she's still home and will be on her way around 9. so we figured that she'll arrived at 9.45, more or less. we texted Mus to ask for his help.

us: Mus, actually we were planning a bachelorette party for Farah. so can you please ask Farah to come here quickly or maybe you can send her over?

Mus: sorry I have issues with traffic

us: *confused, like we're the same, I have issues with traffic as well, like who doesn't?*

us: oh then when will Farah come?

Mus: she'll go, but not with this traffic

we gave up! haha that man is just impossible lol. we were like, okay thanks bye.

then, she called us. 'WEH, I'M LOST!' girl, we also lost by now. hahaha. our mind went blank. her GPS doesn't working. she almost cried. she said she'll just go back home and that day was just unlucky for her. lol that's sad because we wanted you to have the best day :'( we decided that we would just pick her up at her house in Sg Buloh. and it was almost 10 at that time. travelling time back and forth would take us a hour plus. almost two! we picked her up, yada yada yada. arrived at the place, yada yada yada. on our way up, she asked, how did you guys surprised Dayang just now? if there were like sash for her, mesti cantik kan. we froze! ana was like, yeahhh..... then,

soo happy for her, but the struggle to handle her is just out of this world!

SURPRISE!!!

there's your sash girl! btw she asked us on the matching PJs that we wore. it was sooooooo hard to plan anything for this girl. the struggles were surreal. but, the fun part is, she never notice anything. hahah. so we eat, at 12 am. can you just imagine how hungry all of us were?

we played games. reminiscing all the good times back in SEMASHUR. we asked questions on who did this and that. the funny part was when, even Faten knew who would be involved in such incidents. she's so part of us now hahah. it was a good night. we slept at like 3 in the morning.

the next morning, we made breakfast together. aaaa I just love the feeling waking up to your friends around you. cooking together. when we were getting ready to check out, all of us, in front of the mirror, make up! we are all adults now! ok now I'm emotional :'(

the four pening kepala girls. we had 4 chat rooms to keep up! 🤷‍♀️

told you guys, I'm the funny one 😉

just us, telling Farah about our conversation with Mus

my lovelies

we've been friends for over 10 years now and I just cherish every time I have spent with them, back in SEMASHUR and even now. how all of us have grown up to beautiful ladies. from kids who were called to stand in front the perhimpunan just because all of us pergi fly to we grown up ladies, some has already working, some in their last few semesters. one of us is getting married. aaaaaa :'(

TUESDAY

my genius bebe <3 td="">

not to forget, Faten!

then, there's us hehe

we, farah, ana and I, oh not to forget my himawari, went to Dayang's convo to celebrate her. I am soo proud with my friends. each of us glows differently and I am so proud of that :')

to many more memories together with these precious people I have in my life, I hope all of us will stay best friends for a very long time. we may not talk, meet with each other often, but you guys still there in my heart and mind. take care and have fun in everything you guys are doing. love you guys.

<3 p="">

love, Fyfaa

I AM 23 NOW *a granny*

A few days back (27th August 2019), I turned 23 years old! Old right? I know.

You know, a few years back, I always have this anxious feeling when my birthday came. When the clock strikes 12, I always have this uneasiness the whole day. I felt unwanted, unloved and all those negative feelings. I don't know why, I just feel that way. I always blame myself on things I shouldn't blame. I was ungrateful. That's that. I don't know why, I even mandrem myself like 'You are loved, Afifah. you are special the way you are. Even if you feel not enough, you are blessed with things that some didn't get.' and all that jazz. But that anxious feeling stays. So i hated myself. I would cry myself to sleep everytime my birthday came. 

Since - I don't know when - I started to seek the best in everything. I started to persuade myself that God will never let you feel the way you feel. God is fair, just and merciful. He is the Most Gracious. He will never created one being just because to insult him/her. There are blessings about you that others might not have. Allah blessed His creations with different blessings. Do good and good will came to you. Believe. And since then, I started to feel at ease. I started to feel good about myself. Even when somethings may work differently than what I have planned, I am annoyed, but after a few times, I started to think that there are good behind it. Just have faith. Don't give up, try again. God you have no idea how calm that makes me feel.

When I started to be grateful, everything that happened seems so right. 

So this year, when my birthday came, I didn't really feel anything. I was just jokingly remind my family that tomorrow is my birthday - annoyingly. Lol. They were annoyed 😂 So that night, I was Netflix-ing and sleepy so I slept. Then my boyfriend called me. I was so all over the place when he called that I don't really paying attention to what he was saying. Then I take a look at my watch and realized it was pass 12 AM. And I was like 'hello it's my birthday, why don't you wish me?!' and he said, 'I did baby, you're so sleepy ke that you didn't hear?', while laughing at me of course. So he said happy birthday and just asked to sleep and that we will meet the next morning. He posted a picture of me on his Igstory. That thing alone, made me feel so blessed. The next morning my ibu came and wished me happy birthday. Then my friends whatsapp-ed me. It just hit me that, I have a very happy family, which some didn't have. I have amazing friends & I have a wonderful boyfriend, which some didn't have. Just how blessed I am. 

The whole day I feel contented. I was feeling the best! My family are amazing, my friends are wonderful and my boyfriend is simply the best. What could I ask more? God has given me everything I need, so did I once feel not enough? I hate myself for that. 

The things is guys, be grateful. Allah knows the best for you. You just need to be patient, have faith. Allah never fails His creation. We failed him instead :(

So I had a great day, below are some pictures on the day I spent with my boyfriend and family.

So good yums

Hope you guys get to feel every love in the world. Other people may seems like they have everything, they have the perfect life and everything about them is just so wonderful. Just tell you heart, some people may feel the same way when they see you. Have faith, just be kind and have courage. Guess where that from hehe

Love, Fyfah

Internship Feb - Aug 2019

Umm, Hi?

okay, it has been sooooo long, I know. well, for now, no one reads, so who the heck cares whether it's been sooo long or it was yesterday hehe. i was thinking on writing my updated life but that will came after huhu

sooo, as from the title, you would've guess why this girl suddenly sat down and write. i am now in my final year of bachelor degree. fuh, it has been a roller coster. i have never feel this much of stress during my study years. degree, well for now, ARE DAMN TOUGH!! you have no idea how many times i cried during this time. every time it is exam seasons, i would cry. i would bawl my eyes because i just don't know how to absorb every single things in one go. so children, pls study wisely. never do what i do, last minute, it'll kill you. believe me, i have gone through that phase.

for now, i am in my first half of my final year. which mean, i have another semester after my internship. sucks right? i know.

internship. wow, i never thought working would be this tiring, just like what people said, takda life. well that is very true. you basically do the same thing every day. my father is a very traditional man. so no going out at nights, going out at all basically. but me a rebel hehe. so even when i go back home late like 8 something, he would never say anything, but he will look at me with that fire in his eyes, the where were you? and why you are late?, and who is that boy sending you home? look. you know. and when i go out on weekends with my friends, boyfriend or even my cousin, i would not dare to go out when he's home or awake. because, the look will follow, so nope. see, that's why it was soooo boring! same thing, office home office home. no social life, no movie night, no day out. just no. boring

but, i must say, i enjoy my times here. my new friends are amazing! God, they're sooo nice. so glad i met them. so glad i am friends with them. am i still friends with them? pls ask me that now! my first friend would be Farhana, but she's in Assurance while I was assigned to Taxation-Payroll. so we didn't really spend much time together. then, there's Adnin, Munirah, Jen and Ayu. these four gems are everything during my internship. i just love how we care about each other. just how nice they are.

definitely my support system all 6 months

my best-est makan friends

my best photographer goes to...... Adnin <3 td="">

boy do i love them? sooo much

during our first few months, all of us like, siapa kahwin dulu ni and Mun and Adnin would go, hahahha takda doh. (Ayu and I have boyfriend at that time, so we good haha). and then, towards the end, Mun have one and so does Adnin. we would go usik usik them two where Adnin would meet someone from Johor, since she is from Terengganu and Munirah would be the first one to get married, because she's letting her father to choose for her. then, who would've guess that Adnin will fall for someone from Johor and Munirah is currently in the know each other's heart phase. we tell each other the things about our bfs. when Mun have problems with her boy, we will give our opinions and advices, and yada yada yada. it's like we are all in this thing together you know. haha. 6 months, but they feel so much like a family to me.

PwC Corporate Services (Tax - Payroll)

my colleagues, they were nice as well. well sometimes, i do feel like i am being used here, but yeah, i am an intern what do i expect. but towards the end of my period, like right now, i feel so much closer to them. we can laugh, talk and more relaxed when we're with them. even when we hangout, we'll be like friends you know. so i am gonna miss them soooo much later when my contract has end. the environment here is very nice. well, there are some racism going on, but it's Malaysia. so yeah, whatever.

<3 p="">
I feel like I have soooo many things to say, but maybe when i have ended my period here, then only i will tell you more.

as for now, that's all fuh

love, Fyfah